I finally have a break in a three week work-a-thon. This whole Lebanon crisis situation has taken a good year off my life, though every minute has been worth it. Or so I can say now that it seems to be coming to an end.
I know when I leave I’m going to miss all of this- the highly political work, the stress, the constant demands to be tuned in and “on” – both mentally and physically. But, at the same time I can’t help but think one can only live this way for the long-term if you accept smoking, drinking and singledom as your mantra. Basically, to survive and succeed you have to marry the job (and the org!) and fully invest your soul in the political intricacies If this had taken place 10 years ago I may have been ready to do so, but now in my 30s, I am aware of the emptiness of committing one’s self to one’s work alone. You can’t have everything in life at one go, but if you are lucky, I think you can just enjoy all the phases, and I’m ready for another phase.
Parallels to Punjabis and living life to the full:
Now, let me just say this about the Mashreq (Jordan, Syria, Lebanon etc) – the people live their life to the fullest. It’s an interesting mix between being European to some degree, and still maintaining Asian roots. The same penny-pinching you see in the South of India is missing – in fact, the closest I can place the Mashreq to is the Punjab and Punjabis, but with a stronger western twist added in. For all those India lovers, I really don’t need to say any more. The women in all three cities (Amman, Damascus and Beirut) were gorgeous and dressed very well and showed a lot of skin (and did so openly – not something you necessarily see in Northern India). But I would say that modernisation and a western outlook is still only a veneer throughout the region. For example, you may think you are in a western town but then you go into some bars (at five star hotels) and they are full of men – the only women being a handful of Russians working the joint. In the same vein, groups of young, good-looking, well-dressed people wander the streets, parading themselves and enjoying the warm nights – but most of the groups are single-sex. One day I wore a skirt in Amman and regardless of my modest shirt etc., the skirt received a lot of attention. Very strange, when women in tinsy little tank tops were surrounding me- but they were local and of course not to be touched! I heard a lot of stories from the expatriate women in the region that they were often approached by men in the street or by taxi drivers etc for sex etc. This reminds me of my experience with Pakistani cab drivers in NYC – in the end it just seemed safer to walk home at midnight than catch a cab!
Of course in comparison to Europe, there is something very sexy and vibrant about the Middle East – more so than India in some ways. The night life in Damascus carried on to the early hours, with restaurants full to the brim, people out picnicking in parks, and having fund. In Amman, the streets were a little emptier, partly as it is a spread out city in comparison to Damascus and very new in its infrastructure. But, the restaurants were all bustling. And then there’s Beirut, which I think must never sleep – even as bombs fall. One expatriate said that he loved the Jordanians partying and then came to Beirut and realised what real partying is about!
Border Management Issues:
From a professional point of view, I was shocked at border security. I can’t really cross a border any more without rating its security systems and use of biometrics, checking of identification documents etc. And while Lebanon and Jordan were the better (and the Lebanese strive to be very strict and cautious of their borders), all three countries have some serious issues in terms of docu-checking, visa fraud etc. Syria is of course totally porous – the desert really seems immense and all the crossings are wrought with dust and crowds clambering to be let in or out. At one border, all the Syrians push to put their ID cards forward, papers jumbled and falling all around. Then a guard, using a loudspeaker, calls out the names: “Mohammad Qadr”, “Rafiq Ali” etc etc. Of course there is no way to ascertain in this made melee that Mohammad Qadr is in fact the same Mohammad in the banged up ID card handed in. On our drive out of Amman to Damascus, we passed the road to Baghdad. In seven hours we could have been in that city. I can’t go into too much detail, but let’s just say that at one crossing into Syria, we basically paid one of the guards for our visas (hard currency is the magic word). By the time we left Beirut, we’d spent so much time on the Lebanese-Syrian border, that the guards all knew me, and greeted H and I very heartily as we wheeled our cases along the non-man’s land bridge.
Call to Prayer:
The other interesting thing for me was to hear the call to prayer again. It really evoked a lot of old feelings and images from Bahrain. In Damascus, where the call was more prominent and even though I’m not Muslim, nor am I very religious any longer, I understand the power of the call – it reminds you of God and of your duty. The Middle East and the Mashreq can always be romanticised, and in fact, is done so too easily by Europeans, with the result that the dangerous side of the region is hidden or overlooked. I think it is only through living in the region that one gets to see the darker side, including the absolute acceptance of slavery – of women, foreign domestic workers, anyone who threatens the system etc. And what is really the hardest thing to overcome is the bond between the boys – here we see the true meaning of the boys club. A foreign male may be included but no women are ever let in. I think this is one reason why so many of our more Emergency-Field colleagues love staying in the region and not having to deal with women (in the West or in the Arab world).
A region of conflict and contradictions:
Basically, the region seemed rife with contradictions. How can we (the Europeans, the US) plan a “road map” or provide answers when we ourselves are such outsiders and only see the superficial picture? On talking to a number of Jordanian Christians, there seemed to be a great distrust of the Shia Muslims, but toleration of the Sunni. The Christians themselves are divided into sects – drums, Syrians etc., and for the most part get along and intermarry but the communities are not always on such peaceful terms. In addition, entering Beirut, a majority of the returning cars carried Hezbollah flags and where once the rough understanding was Muslim Lebanese for Hezbollah, Christian Lebanese anti-Syrian, the recent conflict has muddied these distinctions. In Syria, a land I always attached to Islam and fundamentalism, the Christian community is alive and well placed, with the Christian old city full of commerce. The only thing seemingly linking the different groups of people is anti-Israeli feeling. And if there had been any sympathy for Israel, tucked away in some community, the conflict, the incessant bombing of a Lebanon trying to rebuild itself, the images of crying children and the descriptions of the stench of the dead under the rubble have erased it all.
My excuse to drink:
Btw, on our second night in Amman, Le Meridien was all booked (UAE football team) up and we had to move to the infamous Radisson SAS hotel! I was kindly informed by my friend at the UN who works on risk analysis that in most parts of the world bombings do not occur again at the same place, EXCEPT in the Middle East, which strangely sees a pattern of repeat attacks. How lovely – this explains H and going out that night and getting blotto and me smoking 3 cigarettes.
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